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    Wednesday, May 6, 2009
    HIATUS / 3:35 AM

    Sorry for not updating that often. I've been uberly busy lately. Apologies. Don't worry, I'll be updating as soon as I have time. Still, drop by once in awhile. Much love.

    -ON HIATUS AT THE MOMENT-

    Courtney <3


    two hundred thirty one to two hundred fifty / 3:20 AM

    231. Just because today is a terrible day doesn't mean tomorrow might not be the best day of your entire life. You just have to wake up and get there.

    232.
    The greatest joy in life always came from doing what others said that you can't do.

    233.
    You know, people are always asking "Are you okay?" but they're never really expecting the truth -- because the reality of the matter is, if i was okay, you wouldn't really have to wonder.

    234.
    My brother said by the end of the summer I'll get the big picture. And I see it. No matter what, times change, things are different. But the problem is, I don't want them to be. [American Pie 2]

    235.
    But if everything was always smooth and perfect, you'd get too used to that, you know? You have to have a little bit of disorganization now and then. Otherwise, you'll never really enjoy it when things go right. -The Truth About Forever-

    236.
    When life offers you a dream so far beyond any of your expectations, is it not reasonable to grieve when it comes to an end? (Twilight)

    237. When it comes down to life, you risk nothing or everything. That's just how it is.

    238.
    Sometimes you need to stand up for what you believe in. Even if that means standing alone.

    239.
    Oh yes, the past can hurt. But the way i see it, you can either run from it or learn from it. -The Lion King

    240.
    More than anything, all I ever wanted is to be close to someone. More than anything, all I have ever wanted is to feel as if I wasn't alone. - A Million Little Pieces

    241.
    At some point you have to realize that he doesn't care, and maybe you're missing out on someone who does.

    242.
    There is nothing wrong with change as long as it is in the right direction.

    244.
    The best thing you could do is find a person who loves you, for exactly what you are. - JUNO <3

    244.
    Mary: don't break my heart.
    Robbie: don't break my jaw.
    Mary: don't break my heart
    and i won't have any reason
    to break your jaw.
    - 7th Heaven.

    245.
    Truth is, sometimes you scare the shit out of me. You make me feel as if I'm not alone, yet I know any minute you have the ability to rip that feeling from me. Truth is, I love you & that in itself is scary enough.

    246.
    I'm not good at future planning. I don't plan at all. I don't know what I'm doing tomorrow. I don't have a day planner and I don't have a diary. I completely live in the now; not in the past, not in the future.

    247. Sometimes you have to be silent in order to be heard.

    248.
    And the sad part is, that no matter what goes on this year, when you come running back to me again, you know I'll be here. [[Dawson's Creek]]

    249.
    You are the only person that can make my heart beat faster and slower at the same time. - Hot Chick

    250.
    If your heart was really broken, you'd be dead.


    Thursday, April 30, 2009
    two hundred to two hundred-thirty / 2:16 AM

    201. Nobody wants to hear this, but sometimes the person that you want the most is the person that you're best without.

    202. And when it's all said and done, you have to face reality and accept the truth. You know nothing will ever change, everything is what it is, just the way it should be. As much as it may hurt, you have to let go -- cos it'll only hurt twice as bad to keep holding on to someone who's already let you go.

    203. Can't understand? I'll slow it down for you.

    204. When you can’t remember why you’re hurt, that’s the time when you’re healed.

    205. It’s not easy to state a reason why you fall out of love. Some might think it’s just an excuse. Some might actually not believe. Some will blame you. Some might even get mad at you. What they don’t see is the fact that it hurts even more to hurt someone who doesn’t deserve to be hurt especially when you can’t actually state the reason why you’ve fallen out of love.

    206. You are maybe one of my worst nightmares, but you will always be my beautiful sunshine.

    207. I tried to forget love, cause love's forgotten me.

    208. Sometimes I can say that I moved on. But deep inside, I know I’m stranded. I don’t know how long I’ll be like this but as long as I feel love, there will always be pain.

    209. I love pictures because the best thing about it is that it never changes even when the people in it do.

    210. it's gonna be hard. when i'm gone. i'll take this time to sit down and write you a song.

    211. one moment can change your mind, one look can change your heart, & one person can change your destiny.

    212. one of the worst feelings in the world is having to doubt something you thought was unquestionable.

    213. don't talk to me. don't smile at me. don't even look at me. cause i'm not going to let myself fall again.

    214. and as soon as you're happy there’s always going to be that one person to screw everything up.

    215. it's funny when you find yourself looking from the outside. i'm over here but all i want is to be over there.

    216. take chances.. because honestly, wherever you end up and with who, it always ends up just the way it should be.

    217. i've never felt so beautiful as i do now.

    218. girl: why is your heart beating so fast?
    boy: because I'm sitting next to a pretty girl

    219. time goes by a lot slower when you miss the one you love.

    220. a kiss is a lovely trick, designed by nature, to stop words when speech becomes superfluous.

    221. in my wildest dreams, you always play the hero in my darkest hour of night, you rescue me, you save my life.

    222. a true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though they know that you are slightly cracked.

    223. lets ignore each other and pretend the other doesn't exist. but deep down lets know'it wasn't supposed to end like this.

    224. you lift my feet off the ground, you spin me around, you make me crazier, crazier.

    225. it's not a matter of "are you okay?"
    it's more a case of "will you ever be?"

    226. she says she wants to die but in reality she just wants to be saved.

    227.you make me feel like i'm worth something. even when i feel like i'm not good enough.

    228. I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past.

    229. I was always told boys don't have hearts, but now i know that's not true because that boy has my heart.

    230. And I want to speak those words but I guess I'll just bite my tongue.

    CHECK THIS OUT. <3
    HE: Can I buy you a drink?
    SHE: Actually I'd rather have the money.

    HE: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
    SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

    HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
    SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

    HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
    SHE: I must've been given your share.

    HE: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
    SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

    HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
    SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

    HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
    SHE: Okay, get out.

    HE: I think I could make you very happy.
    SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

    HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
    SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

    HE: Can I have your name?
    SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?

    HE: Shall we go see a movie?
    SHE: I've already seen it.

    HE: Where have you been all my life?
    SHE: Hiding from you.

    HE: Haven't I seen you some place before?
    SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

    HE: Is this seat empty?
    SHE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

    HE: So, what do you do for a living?
    SHE: I'm a female impersonator.

    HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
    SHE: Do not enter.

    HE: Your body is like a temple.
    SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.

    HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
    SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

    HE: Where have you been all my life?
    SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life - in your wildest dreams.



    Sunday, April 26, 2009
    a hundred fifty one to two hundred / 9:52 PM

    151. Sometimes they take people, and they don't say why. Sometimes people leave and never say goodbye. Sometimes there are no second chances to say i love you. Sometimes there are no next times, sometimes you lose someone and you feel like your heart has followed them to heaven. Sometimes there is just nothing you can do to make the tears stop.

    152. & remember to kiss the sun, my love. 'cause life is just too short to have not lived.

    153. I only wish that I could catch you staring back at me.

    154. And when we're together, we're too good for the world.

    155. I thought love was just a mirage of the mind;it's an illusion, it's fake, impossible to find. But the day I met you, I began to see, that love is real, and exists in me.

    156. To truly love something you must first give it a chance to fail. If it survives, it is going to be stronger then ever. Distance is pure proof of this, & forever we will love if we survive.

    157. No! You just don't get it, do you? When you love someone, you can't just be friends. It doesn't work like that.

    158. The minute you think you're going to lose something, it suddenly becomes the most important thing in your life.

    159. The other day, I wasn't storming off in anger, I just didn't want you to see me drive away with tears in my face.

    160. Sometimes a person has to let go because their heart is just too tired of holding on.

    161. Too often we don't realize what we have until it's gone. Too often we're too stubborn to say, "I'm sorry, I was wrong." Too often it seems we hurt the ones closest to our hearts and we let the most foolish things tear us apart.

    162. If you search your heart and listen to its instructions, you'll end up where you belong.

    163. And there's a passionate romance between them that can't ever be stopped.

    164. I can't breathe. It's like this love I have is suddenly being overpowered by this pain I feel of him not loving me back. x/3

    165. Goodbyes hurt you more than anything, especially when deep down you know you will never say hello again.

    166. I don't miss you. Well, no who you've become. I miss the boy I fell in love with, the one who taught me to love life and never care about what other people think. I miss the boy who had lost so much, but was always ready for what tomorrow brought. I miss the old you, but he seems to have gone and I guess that's why I did, too.

    167. Dream a little today; you can face reality tomorrow. <3

    168. She types, "I'll be okay," as the tears run down her face.

    169. Would the seven-year-old you from so long ago be proud of who you are today?

    170. You fucked with my head. You made me think you cared. But how dare you fuck with my heart. You made me fall in love with you. When this was all just a big joke to you.

    181. It's hard to get over people. I mean really get over them. You can start to have feelings for other people, but it doesn't mean you're over them. It just means you're moving on.

    182. Every time you're near, baby, I get kinda crazy in my head for you. I don't know what to do and oh, baby, I get kinda shaky when they mention you and I just lose my cool. My friends tell me something has come over me, and I think I know what it is: I think I'm in love. Boy, I think that I'm in love with you.[ Jessica Simpson ]

    183. Part of me just wants to find the right words to hurt you, the same way you hurt me.[ One Tree Hill ]

    184. Like not being a double zero in jeans unnaturally; skeletons just aren't my thing. So what if I jiggle a bit, confidence will give me all the happiness I need. It's okay if I'm not the hottest girl around, as long as I have decent personality, I'll be fine. I've lived, I've laughed, I've loved. Maybe not in the ways people would appreciate, but it's been more than enough for me.

    185. She still glances at you every time she walks by. Not enough for you to notice, though. Face it. You love yourself way too much to ever love anyone else. She thought you were something different from the rest, but you would rather be getting in her pants. So she gave up on you and she's going back to the person who was there for her in the beginning.

    186. We run in the rain. We have slumber parties. We sing in the street at 6am because we've stayed up all night. We find trees to climb. We help each other in pain. We talk shit about the whores in our school. We wear each other's clothes. We take thousands of pictures. We text while we walk home separate ways. We shop 'til we drop. We prank phone call the people we hate. We make up different words to our favorite songs. We can be very dangerous. And we sleep in the same bed. Yeah, that's right, fuckers. We're best friends forever. <3

    187. You're as stupid as you are attractive. Such a shame. God spared nothing on the looks, but ran short on the brains.

    188. A person is never strong enough to defeat love, it always winds.

    189. And the funny thing is that I can't seem to remember what I ever saw in you.

    190. Never compare yourself to anyone. You are only comparing your worst to their best.

    191. It's the simple things in like we never forget. It's those words we wish we never said. It's the happy endings in fairytales we want to have. And it's those amazing memories we want to rewind and relive again.

    192. I need you. I don't know why, but every now and then in my life, for no reason at all, I need you.

    193. I fell in love, in love with you suddenly now theres no place else i can be but here in your arms. <3

    194. & it's not up to me anymore. If you really want me in your life, you can find a way to put me there.

    195. and when the lights went out you kept on s h i n i n g.

    196. Let's run away. Name a place where the air tastes like rain and the sun shines like Sunday morning. You'll bring your laughter and I'll bring my sense of humor. We can waste the days, one week after another. Turn the music up and fall in love with me.

    197. I think what hurts the most is having the perfect picture of how things could be, should be, but aren't.

    198. She's lost in love, just look into her eyes.

    199. Don't use excuses. Don't ask why. It's just a breakdown; happens all the time. So get out of my face, don't even try. You wanna help me? Just let me cry. [ Ashlee Simpson ]

    200. If you didn’t love him this would never have happened but you did, and accepting that love and everything that followed it, is part of letting go.



    a hundred one to a hundred fifty / 12:25 AM

    101. You know when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales? That fantasy of what your life would be -- white dress, prince charming who’d carry you away to a castle on a hill. You’d lie in your bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, prince charming -- they were so close you could taste them. But eventually you grow up and one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is, it’s hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely because almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope and faith that one day they would open their eyes and it would all come true. [Meredith of Grey's Anatomy]

    102. Love is when twelve people are calling your name && the only voice you can hear is his. <3>

    103. Boy it`s clear to see, that you`re the only one for me.

    104. In life, the things you don’t want to remember, are usually the things you can never forget.

    105. Though my days have been hell at times, I still reserve a reason to smile. Though destiny seemed to test my strength with all those shit, I still managed to keep my fate. Because I know, that after every freaking tear that falls from my eyes comes a new spark of happiness that is even greater than every sucking pain I felt. Damn! I still believe in happy endings.

    106. I'm standing on the moon with nothing left to do, with a lovely view of heaven, but i'd rather be with you.

    107. I can't explain this feeling, I think about it everyday. And even though we've moved on, it gets so hard to walk away...

    108. The minute you think of giving up, think of the reason why you held on so long.

    109. Why does something that feels so good, hurt so bad?

    110. See how he comes up & tells a stupid joke, & she rolls her eyes at him & seems annoyed? Look in her eyes & you can tell she secretly loves it.

    111. If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together, there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe ; stronger than you seem; and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we`re apart.. I'll always be with you. (Winnie the Pooh)

    112. He's got a masters in personality, straight A's in smiles, & a PHD in breaking hearts x3

    113. Laugh until your body aches, cry until you start to shake, live like the world is yours to take, love as though your heart wont break.

    114. That pain you feel, that's life. The confusion and fear, that's there to remind you that somewhere out there is something better. And that something is worth fighting for. <3 [[ One Tree Hill ]]

    115. You'd better slow down, don’t dance so fast 'cos time is short && the music won't last.

    116. So basically I'm just a stupid girl who keeps her hopes and expectations way too high who's heart gets broken way too easily and who's dreams get crushed way too fast.

    117. The second chance means nothing if nothing was learned from the first one.

    118. They rock their abercombie jeans with class and smile with their perfectly white teeth, wave to everyone with their manicured nails and check their make-up in a jewel studded mirror. But everyone can see that their greatest accessory is their friendship that they share together and not even the most gorgeous boy can take that away from them.

    119. Girl: What would you like to lose? Your sight, your hearing, or your voice?
    Boy: My heart. so it won't hurt when i can't see your face, when i can't hear your voice, and when i can't say i love you.

    120. Smile and let the whole world wonder why.

    121. When I see him, I have nothing to say 'cause the damn urge to kiss him takes my breath away.

    122. I want you to look at me like you never have looked at anyone else. I want you to look at me like I have something other girls don't.

    123. I wanna be the girl that you want to watch a scary movie with. <3

    124. A teenager is a person who can't remember to walk the dog but never forgets a phone number. A weight watcher who goes on a diet by giving up candy bars before breakfast . A youngster who receives her allowance on Monday, spends it on Tuesday, & borrows it from her best friend on Wednesday. Someone who can hear her favorite singer three blocks away, but not her mother calling from the next room. A whiz who can operate the latest computer without a lesson, but can't make a bed. A student who spends twelve minutes studying history & twelve hours studying for her driver's license.

    125. One of the worst feelings in the world is having to DOUBT something you thought was UNQUESTIONABLE.

    126. I'm here to please you, so grab my hips, put me right where you want me, kiss me like you'll never let go, and take my breath away boy. I'm all yours.

    127. So scatter me across the sky, I'll shine all night && just like a star I'll fall for you.

    128. No camera could ever capture the look in her eyes & the feeling in her heart when she looks at him.

    129. True strength is holding it all together when everyone expects you to fall apart.

    130. The boy I love is like a star. I know that reaching for him is impossible, but I always keep trying hoping that somehow he'll fall for me.

    131. Between the distance that i fear and the heartache of you not being here, our love is strong enough to make it through because there is only enough space in my heart for one. & I'm giving that space to you.

    132. I hate how we don't talk for weeks but then all of a sudden you talk to me again. And it is like as if nothing happened and slowly I start falling for you... all over again.

    133. We used to be able to talk about everything but now it`s impossible to even start a decent conversation with you. You cant deny it, things have changed. We've grown apart & you have to face the fact that i will no longer be there every single time you need me. The truth is what it is & that is I do not have anymore respect for you as an individual now you're just another face in the crowd.

    134. You could patch up whatever was broken, but it you were the one who had fixed it, you'd always know in your heart where the fault lines lay.

    135. I know you're worth the wait and i can't explain what i'm going through inside. But i would turn away the world just to have you here with me tonight.

    136. She doesn't know what she wants anymore. All she knows is who she wants, and that's the boy who doesn't want her back.

    137. I don't know if I like you, want you, love you, or hate you. All I know is that I hate the feeling I get when I'm not with you. <3

    138. This doesn't hurt, it fucking kills. And knowing that I had you once, oh it gives me chills. I still remember holding you and the way we used to kiss. I wanna feel you like I used to.

    139. People have scars. In all sorts of unexpected places. Like secret roadmaps of their personal histories. Diagrams of all their old wounds. Most of our wounds heal, leaving nothing behind but a scar. But some of them don't. Some wounds we carry with us everywhere and though the cut's long gone, the pain still lingers.

    140. If I had known it was going to be the last kiss, I would have never stopped. If I had known it was going to be the last hug, I would have never let go. If I had known it was going to be your last smile meant just for me, I would have never looked away.

    141. Looking back I remember every moment where he made me feel on top of the world. I was the world, not only that, I was the sun, the moon, the sky, and all the stars in it, in those moments I was infinite, I was everything , I was his.

    142. I can still remember that moment I looked in your eyes for the last time and that one little memory still has the right amount of love to make me cry.

    143. The closer I get to feeling, the further I'm feeling from alright.

    144. And it just happened, no discussion needed. We just both knew that very moment we wanted to be together.

    145. Roses are red and violets are blue, will you be happy if i say i love you? Sugar is sweet and baby you are too, I'm going crazy, but what can I do?

    146. There is no distance on this earth as far away from yesterday.

    147. Never say goodbye because goodbye means going away, and going away means forgetting. -- Peter Pan --

    148. Everyone knows that the seasons change; it's unavoidably obvious. But for some reason everyone tries to ignore the fact that people also do.

    149. Losing your first real love; it's like waking up from an overdose & realizing that you're still alive.

    150. Love is a funny thing. It's an intensely personal yet universal thing. It has a thousand definitions, & not one of them gets it exactly right. It's a feeling. It's an experience. It's inside of us & yet elusive. We desire it yet fear it. It's the central experience of our lives, & yet it remains a mystery. x3


    Saturday, April 25, 2009
    fifty-one to a hundred / 1:20 AM

    51. I've come to realize that you can't get what you want usually. You can't just sit there waiting to be noticed. You can't sit there expecting someone to love you, because the person who feels the same way just may be waiting and sitting like you are. You need to find each other.

    52. Come on, you'll have me this time. And baby, I've been waiting for so long. Make me yours, I'm dying to hear you say those three words.

    53. We all want to fall in love. Why? Because that experience makes us feel completely alive. Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is shattered, & we are flying into the heavens. It may only last a moment, an hour, an afternoon. But that doesn't diminish it's value. Because we are left with memories that we treasure for the rest of our lives. x3

    54. Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. Love is a battle, love is a war, love is growing up.

    55. And every time you're around I bite my tongue because blood in my mouth is better than tears on the ground.

    56. Love is something you can't describe, like the look of a rose, the smell of rain, or the feeling of forever.

    57. If i had a snowflake for every time i thought about you, we would never have school. x3

    58. I believe in love and in arguing, in jamming out by yourself in the car. I believe in having someone tell you that you’re beautiful, dancing in the rain and miracles. I believe in smiling until your cheeks hurt and laughing until you pee. Lastly, I believe in second chances even if you’re completely screwed up.

    59. 50% of what people say when they are joking, is true.

    60. My new favorite song, is the beating of your heart.

    61. A promise is a promise, at least that's whatthey say. Welcome to reality, they're broken everyday.

    62. Suddenly, I knew what I had to do. Love isn't about little words. Love is about grand gestures. Love is about airplanes, pulling banners over stadiums, proposals on jumbo-trons, giant words in sky writing. Love is about going that extra mile, even if it hurts, letting it all hang out there. Love is about finding courage inside of you that you didn't even know was there.

    63. He is my self-inflicted pain. A preposterous diversion. A momentary bliss. My blameworthy experience. My poisonous religion. He is my annoyance, and yet he remains to be my only happiness.

    64. Don't say you love me, unless forever. Don't tell me you need me if you're not gonna stay. Don't give me this feeling, I'll only believe it. Make it real or take it all away.

    65. He kissed me. He really put his arms around me & kissed me. It went through my body like he had flipped some electrical switch and lit me up. His skin was so warm, and he was suddenly so beautiful & I thought, oh this is what all the hype is about.

    66. The stolen glance is the oldest trick we know yet definitely the most obvious sign of hidden admiration.

    67. I don’t know if I’m getting over him or I’m just getting used to the pain.

    68. You make tomorrow worth the wait and yesterday worth remembering.

    69. Only the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, actually do.

    70. I just want a sign to show me that you give a shit.

    71. Sometimes, broken love is like this: “I will still be thinking of you just the same way. I will still be feeling those butterflies in my stomach whenever you are around. I will still look at you with such wonder of how someone so near to perfection came my way. I will still care for you just the same way. I will still pray for you every night before I sleep. But the only difference is you will never ever know.”

    72. Cracks in the concrete are just constant reminders that, even the strongest break down.

    73. Love is an undescribable feeling that will give you the biggest high of your life. Love is profound. It's real. Love is undying. Just wanting to be the best for someone no matter what. Love is being willing to do anything for your special someone. Your heart beats fast & slow together. Love is the need for somone, the feeling you can't live without them. Something you can't help or control. Love can either complete your life & make it perfect, or tear your life apart. You can't explain love, you just know. It's the one thing everyone wants, but still is teribbly scared to fall into.

    74. Life is like a rollercoaster, too many unexpected turns. But by the end, you want to ride it again.

    75. Everyone wants to be happy, nobody wants to be in pain. But you can't make a rainbow, Without any rain.

    76. G: Will you love me forever?
    B: Of course not.
    G: Oh. Okay...
    B: i'll love you even longer than that.

    77. I sometimes pretend to be happy, talking a lot and laughing out loud so that nobody would know what’s really inside. But at the end of the day, I always find myself all alone, encountering the crucial truth that I’m too broken inside that not even a million laughter can take it away.

    78. I hate you for ignoring my existence, for not loving me the way I wish you would but most of all I hate you for making me say I HATE YOU when in reality, I’m just loving you more.

    79. The best feeling in the world is doing something that everyone else said you couldn't.

    80. And I hope when you look into her eyes, all you see is my reflection. It's like falling asleep to a nightmare and waking up with a fairytale.

    81. G: Okay, I have a question for you.
    B: Alright, ask me.
    [[short pause]]
    G: What do you see when you look in my eyes?
    B: You honestly wanna know?
    G: Yeah.
    B: My future. x3

    82. Life is like an ocean. It can be calm and still; rough and rigid. But in the end, it's always beautiful. x3

    83. "It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation." - Herman Melville

    84. People seldom say I love you. And when they do it’s either too late or the love is gone. But when I say I love you, it doesn’t mean you have to stay but I wish you’ll never go away.

    85. I know nothing lasts forever, and maybe we won’t always stay together. But every smile and laugh we shared convinces me that the memories of you and me will last for the rest of my life, beyond forever.

    86. Her shoes are killing her. She lost her lipgloss. Her hair went flat and nothing in her closet looked right. But being in his arms and hearing him whisper, "You look beautiful," makes it all worthwhile.

    87. It's hard to wait around for something that you know probably won't ever happen again but it's even harder to give up when you know it's everything you want. x3

    88. What if the guy you secretly love tells you that he has already found that special someone, that he wants to spend forever with. Would you be brave enough to ask him who it was? Or bear the pain inside, not knowing that it was you after all?

    89. Fairy tales usually starts with once upon a time and end with and they lived happily ever after. But for us, it is “They lived happily ever after once upon a time.”

    90. You start out life with a clean slate then you begin to make your mark. You face decisions, make choices. You keep moving forward but eventually there comes a time where you look back over where you've been & wonder who you really are.

    91. LOVE. We think about it, dream about it, sing about it, lose sleep about it. And when we don't have it , we search for it. When we do have it, we're afraid of losing it. When we discover it, we don't know what to do with it. It's the short word that's easy to spell, difficult to define and impossible to live without.

    92. All i want is a message, all i need is a sign. Baby, just give me a signal that you're gonna be mine.

    93. "Slow it down, make it stop or else my heart is going to pop." (Lenka's The Show)

    94. When I was a kid, I fell from a tree but I managed to hold on to a branch. I was up there for a long time and waited. The silence, the pain in my arms, the blood pumping in my ears. Then I fell. I could not remember what happened when I hit the ground. All I can remember was the agony of holding on and the wonderful feeling of letting go.

    95. When the person you like walks by you in the hallway & smiles, your day is better knowing that at least for ten seconds of his day he thought of you.

    96. There are just some heartaches in this world that I choose to endure. Once my heart has decided, I live to love that person without question, guilt and hesitation. Yes, even if every moment with him is bittersweet, he will remain my sweetest downfall.

    97. It's not until your fully broken that you realize what you're made of.

    98. Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than the fear. [[The Princess Diaries]]

    99. The longer it takes you to realize you can't go back to the past, when things were the way they were, the longer it takes you to move on.

    100. What does one do when they lose the one thing they think is worth fighting for? They spend their time waiting for a second chance.


    one to fifty / 12:14 AM

    1. I'm not a little girl anymore. I've learned who to trust and who to ignore.

    2. I miss us. I miss how we used to be. How we used to talk, smile, laugh. How we used to be real friends, who could trust each other with everything. What happened to all that?

    3. And the more guys I meet, the more I realize that I only want to be with you.

    4. Tell her why she's perfect for you. Pick her up and tickle her until she can barely breathe.She'll scream and fight, but secretly, she'll love it. Protect her and hold her hand when you talk to her. Look at her like she's the only girl you ever want to be with. When she least expects it, pull her in close and kiss her hard. Tell her she looks beautiful. Get her mad, then kiss her. Let her fall asleep in your arms. Call her and give her piggy back rides. Kiss her forehead. Be slow and don't push anything. Make her feel loved and kiss her in the rain and when you fall in love with her, tell her.

    5. I dont' care about your past. I just want to be part of your future.

    6. Maybe my heart speeding up was a little too much for you.

    7. "I love you." It's becoming so overused that it makes me wonder when you said it, did you mean it? Or was it just another three words in your vocabulary?

    8. I never thought in a million years that this would be the person I'd become.

    9. You can erase someone from your mind. Getting them out of your heart is another story.

    10. Tears are the words that lips aren't strong enough to speak.

    11. Everyone says we're perfect for each other. x3

    12. It's you. You're the one I talk about all the time, the one I can't stop thinking about. The one that can make me laugh when I don't even want to smile, the one that can make me feel better in 2.2 seconds. It's you that I'm crazy about.

    13. We take pictures nonstop, chew a whole pack of gum at a time, yell out stuff at random moments, and eat way too much sugar. We talk when we're not supposed to and call each other way too often. This is how me and my girls are, and if you don't like us, we honestly don't care one bit.

    14. There is never a time or place for true love, it happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single, flashing, throbbing moment.

    15. Everything changes. Friends become strangers. What we hold so dear slips away. The past keeps on fading, but I will never forget you.

    16. All I want is one person. One person to hold me down and force me to say how I really care about what I have to say. One person to hug me and tell me things will be okay, even if they won't.

    17. Of course we'll meet new people and fall in love again. Of course we're gonna hate each other and seek out to hurt each other but we'll always have a history that won't let us forget about each other, no matter how much we want to do.

    18. You could do a million things right, but you'll be forever remembered for that one single mistake.

    19. Don't use excuses. Don't ask why. It's just a breakdown; happens all the time. So get out of my face, don't even try. You wanna help me? Just let me cry. [Ashlee Simpson]

    20. The sad part is, this is becoming a routine. This isn't right.

    21. Do you ever have those days when you feel like the whole world is against you and the people who say they love you and they care are lying their asses off? The kind of days when you feel like you can't trust anyone, and you're constantly forcing a really fake smile and pretending to be happy, when you wanna just scream and cry? And your life feels like it's being flushed down the toilet, and you hope to God that tomorrow is better, because you just don't fucking know how much more you can take? And this whole rambling paragraph barely begins to cover what you're feeling?

    22. The worst thing a guy can do is make a girl fall for him with no intention of catching her.

    23. I just wanna stare at your beautiful eyes and fall asleep in your arms becasue I know that I'm always going to be happy with you.

    24. This is me. Hurting, still. Because I'm not quite sure how else to feel.

    25. You grab my attention when you walk in the room. It could be past midnight and I'm still thinking of you. I cannot control the feelings you got me going through. I want to be yours, but that's up to you.

    26. Funny how time changes, but feelings don't.

    27. Move on. He's just a chapter in the past. Don't close the book, just turn the page.

    28. And I laugh like I don't care, but inside, I'm glad to know you'd do anything to get my attention. <3

    29. I guess I just want to be a kid again. I want to go back to believing in everything and knowing nothing at all.

    30. In class, we were laughing so hard. Everyone was quiet, except for you and me. They all stared, asking themselves why we are falling for each other again. Well, maybe they're just jealous because we have what they want and we're not about to give it up.

    31. I'm not the kinda girl who's gonna tell you how cute your eyes are or how much I want a hug. I'm the kinda girl who will ignore you in the halls until you talk to me or hit me to get my attention. I won't ask you out. It's up to you, idiot. Now you know how I am, so take me or leave me.

    32. Every day, I fight back the urge to text you or call you, telling myself if you wanted to talk to me, you would.

    33. Goosebumps on my arms. Chills in my spine. Excitement in my head. Love in my heart. Yeah, it's true. I talked to you.

    34. Some dreams just aren't meant to come true. I learned that from you.

    35. My stupid mouth has gotten me in trouble. I said too much again.

    36. While other girls doodle hearts, I scribble tiny stars; little wishes for everything to somehow be okay.

    37. It's time to let you go, it's time to say goodbye. No more excuses, no more tears to cry. There's been so many changes, I've been so confused. All along you were the one, all the time I never knew. You're my best friend. It's so hard to let you go now with all that might have been. I'll always have the memories, she'll always have you. Fate has a way of changing, just when you don't want it to.

    38. And it kills me. Breaks me down every single day knowing that we won't ever be what we used to be.

    39. The more you get to know a person, the more attractive they become to you. Because everything beautiful you see on the inside of them, suddenly you're able to see on the outside of them, too.

    40. Today, I caught you looking at me. I was talking and you were watching. I don't know if it was a sign when our eyes met, but I miss you.

    41. I can yell at you, be mad at you, say stupid things and take them back, even pretend I hate you. But nobody in the whole world cares about you more than me.

    42. We're all just every day people and there's a part of you connected with everyone else, and there's me and there's you. Oh, if you only knew.

    43. Happiness comes in many forms. In the company of good friends, in the feeling you get when you make someone's dream come true, when the promise of hope is renewed. It's okay to let yourself be happy becasue you never know how fleeting that happiness might be. [One Tree Hill]

    44. It's sad when you grow up and realize that there will always be that girl who is prettier. That girl who is more charming. And that girl who could win him over in the blink of an eye.

    45. It's a little obvious darling; I'm trying to make you fall for me.

    46. Just think. There's someone out there dying to get you to notice. Just think. someone's staying up staring at their ceiling thinking only of your smile.

    47. Everything happens for a reason, but the hard part is trying to figure out what the reason is.

    48. When we meet again, we'll have one of those fake conversations, mention the weather, and have a Coke. Because that's what people do when they grow apart.

    49. Life changes every ,inute of every day. You lose friends. You gain friends. You realize your friend wasn't ever really your friend, and that person you used to hate can make a really good friend. You look for love. You find love. You lose love. You realize all along that you've been loved. You laugh, you cry. you laugh so hard that you cry. You do this, you do that. You really wish you hadn't done that. You then learn from that and are glad that you did. You have your ups. You have your downs. You see good movies. You see bad movies. You wonder if your life is just one big movie. You look at others and wish you were them. You then realize who they are and are glad that you're you. You love life. You hate life. In the end, you just find yourself happy to be living life, no matter what's thrown at you.

    50. She's different from the rest of the girls. She's not fake. She can tell you good music. She likes to dance, sing, and act crazy with her friends. She will overanalyze everything you can possibly say. She can argue, but she hates to. She hates drama and can live without it and the people that cause it. But the one thing she will never understand is why he can't love her the way that she loves him.